8.01.2021

I remember, it was a winter evening and we were assembled in the hostel ground; I was the head of a hostel and being head I had to set up some rules in the hostel which we all were obligated to follow. We were discussing, meanwhile one of the girls among them said to me ” We never had freedom at our home and here too you are imposing some restrictions upon us, we want to live freely”. Eventually, each one of them started telling about their life and the challenges they faced- as most of the girls belong to the villages of Rajasthan and almost suffered the conservative mentality. They believe hostel is the only place they can enjoy their life in their terms. Suddenly another one said ” You are Delhite” so I want to enjoy life; like you, people enjoy there, so made rules accordingly. (Though people have such a misconception that life of Delhites is easy.) Somehow the conversation went on and I politely convinced her that it’s not necessary/easy for everyone to go out anywhere, anytime; irrespective the city they belong too. Also not so easy for the girl like me who set up her own limitations and followed it strictly (following till today). The reason why my Maa called me “strict girl”. During the discussion, the words of them suddenly started revolving around my head repeatedly; as my heart filled up with emotions. I felt sad when I come to know about their life; thereafter I thought ” Is my life is so much easy? or their life is so much difficult”? What I can do for them? Can I help them? What should I do now? And so on… The day I wrote down there life in my diary. Since school till today; I am in habit of writing a diary in which I wrote about my day-how it went? And so on…That was the first time I wrote something different.

Next day we got an assignment which was our rural immersion week in which we had to live in a village. The week was sub-divided into days which include the legal camp, the NSS camp; the task we assigned was to ask their problems and to help/ advise them and to make them aware of laws. No doubt, no city can beat the village life, living there made us feel like at home, we enjoyed, we dance, we sing, we cook, we live as they live, we had fun. But between all those things the more I observed and try to know them; the more I realised as if I’m not aware of anything, the surroundings I live, I only see what I need to see, I never dived deep into anyone’s life, and the problems they are facing each and every day. As we humans have a tendency to think that only our problems are bigger and in that eventuality, we failed to realise that others too have problems, maybe bigger than us. Here I’m not talking about the economical or financial problems, I’m talking about the social problems; the social norms and mindsets of people which become barriers for the independent life. The patriarchal society which treats women as objects and inferior. The society -made rules which restrict the women to live her life on her terms. The rules which belief in an honour killing, The rules which discriminate between men and women. The rules which set the gender roles. Apart from all the speeches and debates, we had there, I somewhere know inside this will be prolonged as change is not easy; though some people were nodding there head. Each day I experienced something new. It’s like the discovery of new things every day.

And all those thoughts and experience led me to write; to share my thoughts. And I started writing here. In the year of 2018, I also wrote my two magazines based on the abovesaid facts and experiences in which I talk about the life of women, their issues and hope to bring some positive change; the journey/ experiences of all those three years. Blessed with the response I received which motivates me to write more and I started writing my monthly articles in which I started sharing my own life experiences as well…And It continues…

As every day is a new challenge and new experience, writing is the best way to share your experiences and learnings. I called it an ” Indirect form of communication”. Sometimes; with some people, you don’t communicate directly; you communicate through words, the words which come to your heart and penned down.

As quoted” Words are everything. Words give wings even to those who have been stamped upon broken beyond all hope of repair”.

I remember my very first article was on “Freedom” itself and at last, I concluded it with the following words:-

माना दिल नहीं पाबंद किसी सरहद का

माना तुम्हारी आज़ादी गुलामी की आदि नहीं

पर जो दफन कर रहे हों जिंदा उसूलों को

उठ ना खडे़ हो किसी रोज़ तूम्हें ही तबाह करने वो…💫

#Happy four years of writing✍🏻

~Adv Ankita Wadhwa

8.01.2021

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