“A hand that rocks the cradle rules the world”.
Indian women, since birth, are instilled with a mindset which does not perhaps go beyond – having kids, cooking, raising a family, not going against the wishes of her family before marriage, not going against the wishes of her husband after marriage, working if the family needs money, not working if the husband’s family find it unacceptable, and the list is never-ending.
There is absolutely nothing wrong in expecting your daughter to become a beautiful bride and raising an incredible family. What is wrong though is to constantly inject into her sub-conscious mind that this is what she is eventually going to be and it is pointless to work towards what she wants. This might be what she eventually wants to do, but it should be HER decision.
Hence, I say teach your girls how to identify and absorb the good traits from others. Give them the power to think and decide what to filter out and what not to.
* Marriage is a choice
Daughters should be made to understand that marriage is NOT the most important thing in a woman’s life. She is not born solely to make babies and cook food for her husband. She is an epitome of strength. She has the power to create life inside her body and that is just what Mother Nature has blessed her with. When she starts to explore her talents, her capability, her intelligence – that is when she starts realizing her true potential. Raise and empower your daughter to have an identity of her own other than being a daughter, a wife and a mother.
She should be constantly reminded that she is strength and beauty combined, and has the power to be or do whatever she desires and she should only get married when she is ready when she finds a man she is deeply in love with.
* Make her strong to raise her voice
If you are being wronged, feel strong enough to raise your voice. It is only you who can stand up for yourself. If you don’t want to get married say it, don’t go on doing courses after courses just to delay the marriage. If you want your independence, work for it.
Teach your girls how to be independent. Teach her to raise her voice. Teach her to have an opinion of her own.
* Beauty lies within
Daughters need to be constantly reassured about themselves. Make them realize that beauty lies within. Work on their personalities, rather than their superficial outer beauty. You can do this by NOT stating things like, look at how you dress, who will marry you if you look like this. It doesn’t matter how you look. There is no need to wear 3 pounds of makeup on your face to feel good about yourself. Teach them to do something productive. It will bring the kind of confidence to her which will never fade away with age.
Replace pretty, slim, fair with intelligent, well-spoken, bold, charismatic.
And while you are raising your daughters to be strong, independent, self-sufficient women, instill in them the importance of love, kindness and acceptance.
उड़ने दो मुझे उन्मुक्त गगन में
परों को अपने फिर से फैलाने दो
कब तक पिंजड़े में बंद रखोगे
मुझको क्षितिज तक दौड़ लगाने दो…💫